Pain and choice and Silent agony

I finally know what I am running from.

The choice between all my loves, running after me chasing me, forcing me to pick before they all walk away.

The pain is unbearable, I know because I fell and I cried and cried sobbing away the rip in my head and in my side. Trying to breath but my own tears choked me.

I hated him then, I still do, how could he play such games with me.

The worst thing to do to me is to ignore me. It kills any affection that I've ever had for anything about you.

I asociate the silence you are emanating towards me as pain, heartbreak and hatred.

For it was all I ever knew, was silence coming from those that I had hurt and loved those who sometimes ignored me for no reason.

hated me for no reason

Ignoring me,

I became a mime in their presence; a girl who made gestures but no sound.

They ignored me, all of them.

refusing to see me, because in me was the emotion that I refused to them, at least most of the time. I am not here to indulge in your every emotion.

You are not in love with me. Your in love with the the gifts I give you; confidence, love, happiness. Since when have any of you everloved me for me?

Im tired of the silence it slices through me like a million swords.